The system here, as with most systems in Switzerland, seems to filled with forms and the filling of forms and the placing of hoops for jumping. A quick run-down, as I understand it so far:

1. Scour internet forums etc for flat which looks suitable/isn’t halfway up a mountain/isn’t smack bang in the middle of the red light district/3msq in size

2. Arrange appointment for viewing

3. Queue with 30 other people who are there to look at flat

4. Decide flat is “ok”. Not “great”, not “perfect”, but “ok”. All flats that are “ok” should be applied for. It’s a numbers game. The more you apply for, the more likely you are to get something – anything

5. Put in application for flat. Arrange all paperwork to be sent through to landlord – birth certificate, passport, permit, contract, letter from company saying you work there, marriage certificate of your parents, birth certificates of all 4 grandparents, letter from last Government saying you’re not a criminal and have a licence to keep pets etc etc

6. Wait

7. Either get rejected and start again or get accepted and try to find 3 x month deposit plus first month’s rent (for a flat within my budget that equals the princely sum of 8000CHF – nearly £4,500)

8. Collapse in heap in new flat and cry

9. Go to Ikea and spend next 4 months putting together furniture and looking for the elusive “thingy” which holds together your bed/cupboard/kitchen sink

10. 6 months after moving in realise that whole place infested by rats/mice/snakes and that the charming “ambient glow” is, after all, the glow from 1,000 red lights.

There are positives to the whole thing though.  The deposit (grrr… too much… it’s ludicrous… taking me for a ride etc)  is then put into a secure bank account and, at the end of the tenancy, the tenant gets the deposit back plus the interest.

However, at the moment, 8000CHF is a lot of money. 8000CHF is set aside to buy things. Like, you know, a bed and stuff (yay Ikea! Anyone got an electric screwdriver?). To help, the Swiss have an insurance policy (of course they do!) in place called Swiss Caution. Basically, the tenant pays a premium every year (about 200CHF) which then guarantees their deposit. Ok, so you don’t get your money back, but you don’t have to fork out a huge amount before you start!

Another bonus – heating and hot water is normally included in the rent. This rocks. Coming from a poky London flat where I had stupid storage heaters and a boiler for the water, it’s lovely to think that I can pump out heat all day long and have loooooong deep baths – water up to my nose.

So far, I have to say, I’ve been really slack at hitting the swiss nightlife, I have to admit (from what I remember, it’s very French, especially here. The older adults go out for a couple of drinks and then go home, the younger lot go out to dingy clubs until 3 in the morning and dance to europop). At the moment I’m living in a company flat which, although it is lovely, hasn’t got much…character. It’s a new build and therefore all sleek wooden floors and shiny tops with leather sofas. I kind of want something old and squeaky and homely. 

Anyway, maybe the gods of househunting will be with me when I start my quest this afternoon.

Wish me luck! Oh, and just to make me feel better, please share any house related nightmares…

Livvy has a difficult meeting
Princess Pointful looks like a hypocrite and discusses money
Africa Expat Wife talks about living in Africa and the credit crunch
Grannymar makes treacle tart
Nick gets stuck in traffic
Rosiero gets you ready for motherhood
Reluctant Memsahib has issues flying
Annie’s take on St Patrick’s Day
English Mum makes chocolate meringue muffins
J-Money has an argument with a door
Nilsa talks dating
Hope tries to explain blogging for dummies
Jo has a go at marketeers
LizSara remembers

Did you know? Twenty years ago, 96 football supporters were crushed to death at Britain’s worst sporting disaster.

Is it me?: Why do I always believe the weatherman. He said sun. I dress accordingly. It’s now overcast.

Random twitter update: Hello everybody, woke up to thunder and lightning this morning, then my mother arrived. @justinewalshe

Favourite facebook status: just received spam with the headline “Restore your confidence in bed”. My first reaction was that I’ve never lost confidence in my bed. It’s always served me well as an object and a concept. In fact I love my bed. Then I re-read it and realised what it was selling me. I still have the link if anyone wants it…

Odd search term: i had sex on the 26 of july with my boyf [why don't I get interesting search terms anymore. Mine are all about rugby and chubby men. Note to self - need to get more sex terms in my blog posts]

Last text message sent: Have you died? [Well, Blonde hasn't been around for ages. No twitter updates, no blog posts, I worry!]

Last text message received: Notice. I will be arriving in the pub well in advance of 8pm. Notice ends. [and more than a little drunk as it turned out]

It’s your turn: Look out the window. Describe what you see.

1st random tune on my ipod: The Promise by Girls Aloud

Random picture:

Drinking boots

Another photo sitting in my “sort out” file. There’s something slightly wrong about drinking out of a glass boot. A *rugby* boot on the other hand…

tomtom one mooing

how do men like to be stroked

are women wired to breed

how did you meet husband

licking mouse

pimp yourself out

topless mrs mop

Seriously, I’m starting to worry.

grrr gerard depardieu

spooning drunk

I don’t know if these two are related searches?

i smelled weed and got high

marry an immediate family

i love lsd

do women like to stroke men?

gin is good for the penis?