It’s always slightly confusing and painful when someone does a sudden 180. All the signs are pointing one way, you’ve just got used to the direction, and then, without warning, you’re expected to turn around and pretend that the new way was the one you were heading for all along.
And so it has been this weekend. We met at the airport, he came through the gate looking a little shy, a little unsure. I hugged him and hurried him away. The evening was spent catching up, eating, drinking, kissing.
The next morning we bought breakfast and sat down by the lake, watching the mountains, sitting in a comfortable silence, watching the world pass us by. We met my friends. He charmed them in his quiet, polite, English way. They fell for him a little. I fell for him a little.
We collapsed back into the house at around 1 in the morning. A little giggly (or, in my case, a lot giggly). We fooled around a little, a little kissing, not much more. He turned to me and said “I’m sorry, I don’t like you.” He got up, he left.
I lay there not entirely sure what had just happened. Only knowing that here was a guy who, despite playing one game all weekend, had now changed the rules.
And so we reach this morning. We’re screamingly polite to each other and yet I can’t help but sit here feeling hurt, a little used and more than a little confused.
He’s just sat down next to me and said “I’m sorry about how last night ended.” I brushed it off. I don’t know what to say.
Yet again, even without trying or knowing how, I’ve managed to mess things up.
Happy weekend y’all.
bugger, shit, fuck, sorry
What an arse
sorry to hear that, though it’s sounds like his issues rather than anything to do with you. What an odd thing for him to say.
Looking at this, I don’t think it was you that messed anything up. Really, you didn’t. That was an unpleasant act on the other person’s part IMO.
N
Could he not just have pretended to fall asleep?! Don’t worry, one step further to meeting the right guy! X
Ha! If he’d have fallen asleep in the middle of us kissing, I think I would have been a little upset
It can’t have been you that did something wrong here, Nutty. I think he was just being…I don’t know what he was being. Not nice. But you’ve not messed anything up.
Oh Nutty, I am sorry. It sounds as though he’s got issues that are nothing to do with you. But I know that doesn’t help right now. Huge hugs.
You didn’t mess anything up! The guy is well out of order for treating you like that.
Oh dear! My delight at seeing there was a new entry in your blog is dimmed by what it contains. You did nothing wring — he was a jerk. What is it about sex-dodging men nowadays? Or emotion-dodging men? There’s an epidemic of it, and it causes such pain amongst the women they leave in their wake, like you, wondering what they did wrong. These women did nothing wrong — except by being ordinary human beings who dare to feel fond for someone.
I hope your real friends help you through this. And drinking & crying & eating chocolate & playing rugby all help, too!
I think it’s more emotion-dodging than anything else. Whatever it was, it was weird.
Sounds like he’s an asshole and you didn’t mess anything up.
That really doesn’t sound like your fault. What a bizarre variety of jerk.
What a dipstick – you’re well rid of him. He’s probaby gay, anyway.
ha!
As everyone else has said, don’t blame yourself. You acted consistently — HE was the one that did the 180. What the hell? I’ve had several guys do that to me, and I just don’t get it.
So let me get this straight…he flew to Switzerland to see you and then pulled that? I am speechless. I apologize on the behalf of all men.
I think that was the weirdest thing – he came all the way out here to see me, came onto me, and then ran away.
Men are odd.
If you want I will fly to England and punch him in the face for you.
Having been on the receiving end of such a 180 myself, I know how bafflingly hurtful something like that can be. But it’s not something you can blame yourself for. It’s someone elses head and emotions, and we’re not responsible for that.x
I can only echo comments above. But the spin I will add is that, having met – and spent time getting to know – you, I know you’re really lovely. He doesn’t like you? His problem. The way he put it? The way he cared for your feelings? Signs of an arse who you don’t need to know.
That is all.
Eh?! I’ve met some d**ks in my time, but this tops it all. I mean, what?! No, you’ve definitely not messed anything up. You’ve just met a douchebag with some serious issues.
Kiss a few frogs, you’ll find your prince…
x
WTAF.
It might be worth checking which company he flew out with as they dont appear to be abiding by the rule which states that children arent allowed to fly on planes without an accompanying adult.
Wowsers – quite the turn around. Indeed – we can all sit here and slag off the chap. So to play devil’s avacado – maybe he felt he had talked himself into something he thought he wanted. However underlying doubts began to surface. Maybe they were related to issues other than yourself – perhaps there was someone back at home? Yet he then finds himself in a situation he shouldn’t be in. Rather than let it carry on – he decides best to pull out now and face the music rather than carry on with the lead on.
It does sound as though this was done in a caddish fashion – but it is always best to to jump before the plane crashes. Not a popular move at any rat – however I feel if it did it then – he might have had your best interests at heart.
The arse.
What a fucktard. Seriously. What is wrong with some people?! *Grumble*
Very sorry to hear that Nutty. A terrible way to treat someone, especially after giving lots of positive signals.
Sorry I’m late on this–been abroad.
There are sex-dodging men? An epidemic of them? And women are pissed off about this? Has the world reversed since I was single?
Pingback: Two year itch | Parlez-vous moo?
Bloody hell, that was harsh. Bet that it stung. What a horrible thing for him to say after stringing you along all weekend. Hope you are feeling better!