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Taking a hint

I like to think I can take a hint. Granted, I have been known to stay for one more drink even though it’s clear my hosts are yawning. I may have been observed continuing to flirt with someone who’s not interested. Sometimes, I even text people I know I stand no chance with.

But, generally, I’m there. I’m with it. I can tell when something isn’t going to to go the way I want it to.

For the last couple of weeks I have been dealing with a man who… well… instead of me telling you what I think, I’ll show you. (all spelling etc as in the emails. [My notes])

From: <him>
To: <me>
Subject: Just to say hallo
Date: 1 April

It was nice to see you last week . [watching the local team play rugby]
Thought i would see you yestaday,how is work and stuff? what do you do after work.
This week i am back to the Gym after a minor injury.

From: <me>
To: <him>
Subject: Just to say hallo
Date: 2 April

I was in France all weekend so couldn’t make the rugby. 
Work is incredibly busy at the moment. I don’t usually finish until about 8pm so I just go home and sleep!
I hope your injury heals soon.

From: <him>
To: <me>
Subject: Just to say hallo
Date: 2 April

Yep it heals i’ll be down at training today. If you want pass by after training, or if not possibly tommorow after 8.00pm at [local gym].

From: <me>
To: <him>
Subject: Just to say hallo
Date: 2 April

I don’t think I’ll be going anywhere for the next month or so – work is very busy!

From: <him>
To: <me>
Subject: Just to say hallo
Date: 2 April

What?one mo….nth, dame.should i pop around your place then.

From: <him>
To: <me>
Subject: Just to say hallo
Date: 9 April

[nuttycow] did i shock you? i asked politely if i can see you . Can i?
Wishing you happy Easter.

You know how sometimes gmail adds random people to your gchat once you’ve sent them a couple of emails? This is the sight that awaits me as I log in to my gmail today (clicky to embiggen)

Yes, that’s right. This man has had his status the same for four months.

And it’s a personal message to me.

*shudder*

So what do you think? Do you think my politeness is clear enough? Is it time to bring out the big guns? How would you handle it?

Tagged ,

7 thoughts on “Taking a hint

  1. pikz says:

    Time for a bit of brutal honesty I think. He does not seem to be getting the message x

  2. looby says:

    No, it’s not clear enough. You’re using being busy at work as a code word for saying i’m not interested in you. Men don’t understand this sort of thing. We like to know where we stand. Tell him, I’m, not interested. Women and their codes… we don’t get them.

  3. Redbookish says:

    That’s interesting. I *always* use “I’m so busy at work” as code for “Not now, thank you.” And assume that’s what it means when someone’s (oh well, one man in particular recently) used it on me. But then I am a Nacademic, and everyone knows that “busy” means we’ve had to mark more than one essay.

  4. LC says:

    No matter how many times men explain to women that we simply do not understand subtlety and hints, and that if a woman wants to makes herself clear she should just say EXACTLY WHAT SHE MEANS, they still don’t get it. Maybe, instead of explaining it clearly, over and over again, we should find a way to subtly, almost imperceptibly allude to the fact that we prefer clear, obvious communication – it’s the only way we’ll get women to understand.

  5. Paula says:

    I’d probably just ignore it and hope it went away of its own accord. But I don’t know if this one will unfortunately…

  6. London-Lass says:

    Cant work out if he’s super keen or a bit lacking in the intelligence department (the status message was done by mistake – surely??!) or a bit of both but, either way, he is very annoying and I feel your pain.

    As directed above : ignore, ignore, ignore, is the best approach and should eventually get you the right result (you just have to have patience and grit your teeth until the penny finally drops for him).

  7. HC says:

    Rock that sh*t.

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