The great house hunt

I never thought I’d be househunting again so soon. 6 months ago, I was quite happy in my little flat, doing my own thing, content to stay there for a good while until something else came along. Now, I’m back in the race. And in a city with a current occupancy rate of 99.9%. Seriously. As a result, houses are hard to find and expensive. Landlords can pretty much charge what they like. And do.

The system here, as with most systems in Switzerland, seems to filled with forms and the filling of forms and the placing of hoops for jumping. A quick run-down, as I understand it so far:

1. Scour internet forums etc for flat which looks suitable/isn’t halfway up a mountain/isn’t smack bang in the middle of the red light district/3msq in size

2. Arrange appointment for viewing

3. Queue with 30 other people who are there to look at flat

4. Decide flat is “ok”. Not “great”, not “perfect”, but “ok”. All flats that are “ok” should be applied for. It’s a numbers game. The more you apply for, the more likely you are to get something – anything

5. Put in application for flat. Arrange all paperwork to be sent through to landlord – birth certificate, passport, permit, contract, letter from company saying you work there, marriage certificate of your parents, birth certificates of all 4 grandparents, letter from last Government saying you’re not a criminal and have a licence to keep pets etc etc

6. Wait

7. Either get rejected and start again or get accepted and try to find 3 x month deposit plus first month’s rent (for a flat within my budget that equals the princely sum of 8000CHF – nearly £4,500)

8. Collapse in heap in new flat and cry

9. Go to Ikea and spend next 4 months putting together furniture and looking for the elusive “thingy” which holds together your bed/cupboard/kitchen sink

10. 6 months after moving in realise that whole place infested by rats/mice/snakes and that the charming “ambient glow” is, after all, the glow from 1,000 red lights.

There are positives to the whole thing though.  The deposit (grrr… too much… it’s ludicrous… taking me for a ride etc)  is then put into a secure bank account and, at the end of the tenancy, the tenant gets the deposit back plus the interest.

However, at the moment, 8000CHF is a lot of money. 8000CHF is set aside to buy things. Like, you know, a bed and stuff (yay Ikea! Anyone got an electric screwdriver?). To help, the Swiss have an insurance policy (of course they do!) in place called Swiss Caution. Basically, the tenant pays a premium every year (about 200CHF) which then guarantees their deposit. Ok, so you don’t get your money back, but you don’t have to fork out a huge amount before you start!

Another bonus – heating and hot water is normally included in the rent. This rocks. Coming from a poky London flat where I had stupid storage heaters and a boiler for the water, it’s lovely to think that I can pump out heat all day long and have loooooong deep baths – water up to my nose.

So far, I have to say, I’ve been really slack at hitting the swiss nightlife, I have to admit (from what I remember, it’s very French, especially here. The older adults go out for a couple of drinks and then go home, the younger lot go out to dingy clubs until 3 in the morning and dance to europop). At the moment I’m living in a company flat which, although it is lovely, hasn’t got much…character. It’s a new build and therefore all sleek wooden floors and shiny tops with leather sofas. I kind of want something old and squeaky and homely. 

Anyway, maybe the gods of househunting will be with me when I start my quest this afternoon.

Wish me luck! Oh, and just to make me feel better, please share any house related nightmares…